We build walls around ourselves. We are defensive, demanding and we attack from behind them. Sometimes we feel hurt and other times so that we hurt others. The attacks seem to be unfair some days and completely just on others.
We are longing for love and care...
We compare our own qualities with abilities, views and acts of others and we pamper our sorrow and that we are right.
Our programs affect us. We constantly work on shaping our self-image and we expect feedback from the outside world that we are adequate. Either by giving up ourselves or by fighting, we generate reactions.
Typically we experience the deepest pain with our closest acquaintances, loved ones, friends and colleagues. Although the effect of a few words of a stranger can also be quite surprising. Thus long-long times can pass in pain, rage or helplessness.
Our self-doubt remains hidden many times though, but sadness, separation and indignation leave marks in the outside world, too. Our relationships get doomed; and recovering from the resulting situations is not simple at all without awareness. Our restlessness or our internal shout also compel us to echo our pain as a mantra.
Sometimes the time comes for repentance but even that isn't enough to sooth the bleeding heart or whenever it seeks revenge and mostly just creates more bad feelings, more blame, more self-accusation and demeaning situations. At this point we are still only playing as chess pieces.
What takes us beyond this? When we have a full view of the story and an abstraction of the painful points of our human exiguity. When we are able to recognize that all mistakes, all battles and all demands are ran by the programs of the mind. In all of us. In ourselves and in those as well that we feel from whom we can't get what we want. But living as slaves of programs like such we will keep fighting forever. We do see that it's impossible to force the contradictions of the dualistic world to make peace and that we vainly want to draw strength from the victories, this will never end. We try to force the outside world to agree with us but we merely program our whole life to comprise a series of battles.
In turn we should just accept and love. Not in a sugarcoated way, of course, nor by giving up ourselves nor with any ostrich policy. But with a composed, honest attitude that's supported by common sense as well. Understanding ourselves and others in this way. Only this can permanently override our sense of lack. All other efforts will result in temporary effects and the repetition will drive us to a neverending paranoia.
How can all this change in us? By remaining silent... really silent. Within the real, meditative silence our real self can emerge from behind the surface of our human attributes. That which many refers to as the Self, Wholeness, the Universe, God or Collective Conscious-ness... many other words have been formed about it. That of which we are ONE becomes visible deep inside. The imaginary mystery along with the imaginary hopes and imaginary fears dissipate and the real perspicacity sees duality in it's unity.
And as soon as we taste it, we fall more and more in love with this simple purity again and again and not only in theory, not as a myth nor as a memory. We see, we sense that we are that. Not with our five senses yet immovably. Thus the "outside-world-war " becomes insignificant in our eyes.
Our external and internal activities get aligned with each other. Thus the way our mind works doesn't disturb us anymore but starts to support our harmony and it's criticizing tone gradually takes a back seat. Old thoughts, urges and compulsions fade away and we open up to the world in the same time. Instead of comparisons wordless wisdom drives our lives. We give another chance to everything, we bow our heads to the happenings and instead of giving up ourselves or battling, we actualize everything with our peaceful power. We see that we are life itself and we constantly celebrate, silently.
And we live life to the fullest. In that love and that care that we expected from the outside world until now and we have this through effective activities, energetically, and in harmony.
Our communication towards the world gets simplified. Naturally we are able to express ourselves in a nonviolent way since this is what originates in us. And even if we have to raise our voice every once in a while we still don't loose our stability.
The constant change of the outside world is a natural part of life, no matter how it manifests. The internal stability isn't constant by being fixed to something, neither is it present by nurturing a newer self-image. Internal stability is present by the eternal being that we are. And when we no longer identify ourselves with our characteristics and our limited bodies, then our whole, real self is obvious for us.
After a while we discover even in the shady parts of life how they complement the totality but we don't invest any energy into destructive, nor into self-destructive activities. The power of our focus is clear for us, and we see the beauty of infinity everywhere and in everyone. Without any raving.
The race is over, because it becomes obvious that the one we separated ourselves from comprises the same unity that we actually are. And the joy, that is present by the love that is presently here fills all our cells and all our moments.